Cary Briel

Sometimes I’ll drink
The beer or two
I don’t have to be feeling blue
At all;

Sometimes I’ll drink
As early as two
As best I can
Recall;

Sometimes I’ll drink
Two beers
Or maybe three
In all;

Sometimes I’ll drink
To help me think
And take down the world’s
Wall.

At times my stink
Is too much for even me to bear;
I smell so bad that people stare
At me–
Or sometimes my wife–
And I just think– “that’s life!”

But such is the charge
Of the self-employed,
Such is their life–their hemorrhoid,
Cubicle, tossed away,
Setting their hours of work and play;
Loving the stare–
Relishing the noon underwear.

The tombs
The tombs
The tombs;

Is that what awaits my bones?
In youth I didn’t think such things;
But now I hear the moans;

The moans?– from tombs?

No, silly–
From the soul inside of me;

Oh– but if you have to worry so,
Then why at forty-three?

Well– likely not I’d guess;

But each year more and more you see
My body’s more a mess;

Each year as I, helpless, watch
As more gray makes it’s show
And more hair bids goodbye to me–
Those tombs increase their woe;

And each year when in looking back
The year does seem a day
And time is ticking on and on
In such a torrid way–

So I can’t help it–
I think about it;
I try to put it on the shelf
And not think about myself

But there are so many
In attendance–
So much evidence
Of all who came before
And all who’ve not escaped

The tombs
The tombs
The tombs.

As I stare
I come to realize
And theorize
That I may need to pinch
This skin of varied inch
And wake;
But I– seeing
Through so many eyes
Believing
In their comings and leavings– as they do
As certainly I will too
Do not fully realize
Nor theorize
Nor do I pinch;
Else I’d surely wake
As would they– and they would cease
Their comings and leavings
As would I.

Number two– I fretted
And missed–
And sometimes wished
Ever so secretly,

Privately– you hadn’t left
As you did–
God forbid–
So abruptly;

Number one– you are
Imperative;
Right now I’d give
You number two;

That is– If that wasn’t circular
Illogical
Reasoning– implausible,
So something else;

Choose from it all– nothing withheld,
Choose from the reams,
Muffling screams
Of manhood’s demise.

Digging–
Lifting, that cloudy day,
Wheelbarrow to truck
And driving away;

It was an odd day– assuredly;
Us descending–
To halls of exhumation,
Me pretending;

But it was often so;
It was a Jacob day,
We carried his bones North–
You and I– from Egypt’s sway;

And as you wished, I took him–
Now feet from me he lies,
With the others
‘Neath sunny skies.

I peer out of darkness
Into darkness;
Closeted one might say,
Literally- not gay;
But if I were- I’d likely tell
The world to go to hell;

I peer out;
I feel a touch on left and right,
This suit jacket,
That one’s tight;
Cinder block, the edge I see,
Not so sanitary,
But that’s another story;

Impatience,
Unvirtuous,
Nervous!
But fun;
Shouldn’t that which has no
Virtue be fun? I thought so;

I wait for her for what seems
Like lifetimes!
My thoughts teem,
My brain whirls,
With thoughts of girls;

But shouldn’t this girl be different?
I’ve been lectured but am indifferent;
And I’m young, right?
Ooh! there’s the light.

His eyes– as soul-less stone,
Vacant, empty crypts–
Evoking dead things,
Inviting blackness;

Echos,
Closeted ravages;
They’ve snatched out the real him,
The child his mother knew;

Oh scream and wail, Mother– for how stolen he remains!
Even now- how unknowing she is?
Waiting,
Pleading-

“Forget– your anger– your spurt–
Come back from your storming,
My love–
Return to me.”

It’s just a room,
Of many- Of zillions perhaps,
The kind that’s designed
For baseballs and caps;

The kind that was made
For model airplanes,
For coloring books
And miniature trains;

The kind that has shelves,
Glorious shelves! lining the walls;
Each little item
To little heart calls;

How loudly it calls!
No matter the size
Of kid that it carts,
No matter the guise;

It always remembers
Its true resting place;
It isn’t among
The rats in the race;

It isn’t among
The strong or the wise;
Nor mortgages, condos,
Politics, lies;

The heart does remember
The magic it knew,
Before someone fooled it,
Diminished its view.